Geeky Jokes Thread

So I want to dress up as a UDP packet for Halloween, but I don’t know if anyone will get it…

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<erno> hm. I’ve lost a machine.. literally _lost_. it responds to ping, it works completely, I just can’t figure out where in my apartment it is.

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If you’re a UDP packet, then you won’t care if anyone gets it anyway.

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I would tell you a joke about UDP, but you probably wouldn’t get it.

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One my favourites ever:

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OSPF:

What did the OSPF router say to the other OSPF router ?
Hello. Hello. Hello. Hello. Hello. Hello. Hello. Hello.

And another

Five routers walk into a bar. Which of them will drive them home?
The Designated Router.

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An IPv4 address enters a bar.

The IPv4 address asks if he can start a Tab.

The bartender asks “How do I know you won’t run out?”

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In line with @Ogon

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Q: What did the computer do at lunchtime?

A: Had a byte!

Q: What does a baby computer call his father?

A: Data!

Q: Why did the computer keep sneezing?

A: It had a virus!

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Q: Why was the computer cold?

A: It left it’s Windows open!

Once upon a time, a computer programmer drowned at sea. Many were on the
beach and heard him cry out, “F1! F1!”, but no one understood.

A blonde girl enters a store that sells curtains.She tells the salesman, “I would like to buy a pink curtain in the size of my computer screen.
”The surprised salesman replies, “But, madam, computers do not have curtains.”
And the blonde said, “Helloooo…. I’ve got Windows!”

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Customer: “I can’t seem to connect to the Internet.”
Tech Support: “Ah, right. What operating system are you running?”
Customer: “Netscape.”
Tech Support: “No, what version of Windows are you using?”
Customer: “Uhhh…Hewlett Packard?”
Tech Support: “No, Right click on ‘My Computer,’ and select properties on the menu.”
Customer: “Your computer? It’s my computer!”

Caller: Hey, can you help me? My computer has locked up, and no matter how many times I type eleven, it won’t unfreeze.Agent: What do you mean, “type eleven?”Caller: The message on my screen says, “Error Type 11!”

What does a blonde do when her laptop computer freezes? She sticks it in the microwave.

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There’s a band called 1023MB. They haven’t had any gigs yet.

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CAPS LOCK preventing login since 1980:

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Q: Why was the computer blue?
A: It was freezing.

Q: Who cured the computer virus?
A: Dr. Bitdefender

Q: Who was the computers baby?
A: Mini-ATX

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CEO :rage: : Why are all our “windows” not closing properly!?

Manager : Because “WIND” played part in it!!?:cold_sweat:

Employee: :pray:Sorry its because of me :sweat:. I advertised at all “windows” a mug labeled “CTWUG”!!!

CEO :rage: : If you don’t get every mug labeled “CTWUG” out of all the “windows”, i ashore you every
advertisement that you own will be put in you’re “Recycle Bin” at you’re “Desktop”.

Employee : Mousten!!! Please go :runner: and call you’re friend Ogon so he can help me “trace” :satellite: all the mugs. Then ask Spin to come and tidy up, and help me with a little bit of “Housekeeping”. :pushpin:

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